Day 816

The Three Musketeers! The boys are often together (out of Lilly’s “fur”) and seem to love each other’s company. It is amazing to me that nobody ever seems to be left out of the group. Humans don’t seem to do as well in a pack of three.

As a child, I have vivid memories of being ostracized by a pair within a group of three. I learned quickly that being a member of a threesome could end in hurt feelings.

As an elementary teacher, the biggest recess complaint dealt with someone feeling left out. Teachable moments aside, it was hard to see the “third thumb” crying and indignantly demanding a fix when there was no easy resolution.

As a parent, my heart broke right along with my children's when they felt left out. Now that I am an adult, there have been a few times when being excluded has challenged my own heart.

What is the answer? If we were more dog-like, we would let everyone be part of the pack. However, dogs don’t typically manipulate, feel jealousy or worry about inclusion/exclusion.

My own philosophy is that, unlike dogs, humans sometimes have a tendency to exclude and lack empathy. So…I tap into my own empathetic tendencies and be on the lookout for anyone who might feel left out. Often, the person who is on the sidelines, appreciates someone reaching out to make them feel included and I gain a new friend!

The boys are models of making everyone feel welcome and Lilly likes to be excluded by the male bonding. The “Queen” prefers it that way and that’s just fine as well!