Day 228

12/29/22

Our Gus is such a brave boy! We have now added an antibiotic to his cache of pills each day and he just takes it without a complaint. This gentle guy (he wasn't always like this...believe me!) is the most stoic Golden I have ever known. Having him pull through this last medical emergency was my most special Christmas gift!

I found myself wondering if stoicism is a genetic predisposition. Nurture or nature come into play so often with pups, so I began to do my comparisons. After some thought, my conclusion was that Goldens, with some exceptions, are quite stoic by nature. Dogs, in general, are not complainers. Sweet creatures...

The only one of our four that plays the "baby card" is our "baby," Sam, at 5 1/2 months, probably has the right to play that card and he does it well. If you inadvertently step on his paw, Sam yelps and then whimpers a bit more while the perpetrator asks forgiveness, grovels at his paws and loves him up from one end to the other. It is so cute and I know he will outgrow it. For now, we smile and try to avoid trapping those big paws under our feet!

I have known many people in my life who are stoic...either by nature or need. With some of these individuals, you would never guess the extent of their pain (physical or emotional) due to their smiling faces and concern for others around them. I want to be like that when I grow up!

When I was student teaching in Albany, Minnesota, I was placed with Mrs. Dorn in a kindergarten classroom. If you look up the definition of "stoic" in the dictionary, you just might find a picture of her there! It was a twist of fate that I found myself as her student teacher since I had originally been placed with a much more energetic instructor in the next classroom. To my young eyes, Mrs. D. was OLD (probably younger than I am today), severe and sluggish. I was at the beginning of my journey of practicing empathy, so I missed something HUGE!

This woman allowed me to set the classroom up to welcome the students in the fall. She showed me everything I needed to know to smoothly run a classroom all by myself and allowed me to see the kindness beneath that rough exterior. I discovered her beauty hidden deep within. That all took place during Workshop Week. Whew! My mind was floating with information!

The students arrived on the first day of school and we both welcomed them at the door. After that, Mrs. Dorn told me the class was mine for the day and she went over to a couch by the windows and laid down. I remember asking her a few questions, but decided she wanted to see me in action. Somehow I made it through that day. When we debriefed, she smiled and told me I had done a wonderful job. She also shared that she wasn't feeling well and needed to go home.

Mrs. D. was not in school the next day. The principal, having talked to my supervising teacher, told me I could handle the class. It was a trial by fire, but I moved forward and we all survived.

On the third day of school, Mrs. Dorn passed away. She had cancer, but kept that piece of information to herself. She didn't want to trouble anyone. Her stoic nature had fooled everyone...even her husband.

The fourth day, I sat my class in a circle and told them about Mrs. Dorn. I remember there was a social worker in the midst, but she let me do the sharing. After I finished, one student crawled into my lap...then another until, finally, we were one big hugging, tearful family. I assured them I was going nowhere and then we started our day.

They allowed me to teach that class until my student teaching term was over. To this day, I am not sure how that happened legally, but the decision was made by staff and parents to let me become their teacher. It was an experience I will never forget.

I am not stoic...just ask my family and best friends...tears flow freely when I am with my "safe people." I feel sharing my emotions is a way to honor those who know me best. It is my way of saying, "I know you will continue to love me, even when I don't look strong." I do know I have an inner strength and resolute nature that has brought me through a number of life's challenges. Nurture or nature...I am not sure where that all comes from.

So with Gus, who is such a stoic boy, I look into those beautiful eyes, watch his wounds and observe any little difference in his behavior. If we all did that for each other, stoic or not, the world might just become a little bit kinder place to live.